Recently I named my ego.

Say what??
Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it, especially if you need help accepting yourself as you are.

Ego: noun 

For clarity: My working definition of EGO is that it’s our personality, our sense of self. It’s the part that exists to keep us safe at all costs.

Our egos naturally do or avoid whatever they deem appropriate for our survival. Shaped by childhood conditioning, egos present in different ways including assertiveness or aggression, the need to be right, a desire to be seen, etc.


It was only in my thirties that I became aware of the belief that ‘negative’ aspects of us aren’t parts we should feel bad about. It profoundly helped me to not judge myself and others like I used to.

Introducing Nancy

After reading How To Do The Work last month, I decided to name my ego. Nancy (that’s what I called her) surfaces when I want to be noticed or to rant about something. Nancy likes to get fancy, and a little bit antsy – it’s got a ring to it hey 😉

So, when I want the permission to be more ‘regular me’ than higher-self me, Nancy has a moment.

Naming my ego has provided much amusement. Both I AND my daughter can identify when Nancy’s in the room. It’s given me and us, a tool to be able to identify that energy of mine.

Why’s that good to be aware of?

Being aware of when Nancy’s present means I have the opportunity to witness when I’m speaking or acting from a fear-based energy. I can then choose to self-correct as the higher version of myself.

An ego name is a micro lens adjustment to life but PROFOUNDLY helpful if you struggle to allow for the various aspects of who you are.

MOST PEOPLE I talk with experience levels of embarrassment, disappointment, and even shame around the parts of themselves they can’t accept… areas they feel let them down.

To experience life as an embodied, whole person, we need to be able to accept the full range of how we show up in the world. That includes our egos.

📌 It’s important when choosing a name, to choose a name you don’t already associate with (Nancy’s a neutral name for me). Remember, our egos are parts of ourselves we’re aware of, and don’t judge.

We’re coming to see that more and more things in life exist on a spectrum. Put it another way, within a balance.

Too much or too little of anything creates extremes, so finding a middle ground of our personalities, and giving ourselves the grace to grow is where we find acceptance and as a result, quiet CONFIDENCE!


The book: How To Do The Work is already my most recommended and gifted book this year. It’s simply transformative.

If you’ve tracked with me for a while, you’ll know I’ve often spoken about the authors I learned from in my awakening all those years ago: Eckhart Tolle, Gary Zukav and Michael Singer. Having poured over those books many a time, I’ve wondered what other book in this space could add anything – because they’re so complete.

This book for me, is that. Dr Nicole Lepera writes in the language of NOW digging deep on all those inner wonderings we don’t quite know what to do with or how to process. I hope you find it helpful!


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